Los bebés son estúpidos

Estaba leyendo The Birth of the Mind de Gary Marcus y en medio del libro me encontré con una referencia a este artículo satírico de The Onion: Study Reveals: Babies are Stupid, reacción a todos los estudios que demostraban que los bebés eran más inteligentes de lo que parecían. Empieza con gracia:

The study, an 18-month battery of intelligence tests administered to over 3,500 babies, concluded categorically that babies are «so stupid, it’s not even funny.»

According to Institute president Molly Bentley, in an effort to determine infant survival instincts when attacked, the babies were prodded in an aggressive manner with a broken broom handle. Over 90 percent of them, when poked, failed to make even rudimentary attempts to defend themselves. The remaining 10 percent responded by vacating their bowels.

It is unlikely that the presence of the babies’ fecal matter, however foul-smelling, would have a measurable defensive effect against an attacker in a real-world situation,» Bentley said.

Y va corriendo hacia la sátira más surrealista terminando con Bill Clinton prohibiendo los bebés.

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